Rabbi Shmuley Boteach posted an article today about the damage divorce does to children. I wrote a comment to his article, pointing out that the inevitable damages he lists are not actually inevitable and that not all children are “scarred” by divorce. I pointed out that he himself writes “I was always puzzled at how so many of my friends, whose parents were divorced, were either neutral on the topic or actually happy that their parents divorced, thinking that everyone was better off” after stating that his parents’ divorce “scarred me so deeply that I thought I would never fully recover”.
He hurt, therefore every child of divorced parents must feel the same. He enumerates the damages in the second person: you will suffer these consequence. I wrote that no, he suffered those consequences; not all children do, and that his point might have been stronger had he written in the first person and not projected his experiences onto everyone else.
Since I made no attack, offered no insult, and carefully used only the words he himself wrote, I’m left wondering if he really needs to believe that every child suffers the pain that he did, and the fact that they don’t is too threatening to his worldview to even allow it in print…